My Trip to India

​24 years; it's a very long time. Just about half my lifetime. That's how long it's been since my last visit to India.

Much to my surprise, I got increasingly nervous as the date got closer. I wasn't prepared to deal with what this meant for me as at a personal level.

Where do I belong?

I have never been able to tell anyone this, but I didn't want to go back to India. Ever.

My last visit in 1994 was to meet my then girlfriend's family and offer my condolences. She had passed away in a road accident. It was, and still is, the hardest thing I have done in my life. I can still picture the afternoon in my head like it was yesterday. I remember her mother's face, her brother's sad eyes, her father's silent hello with a head nod, and a large group of strangers wondering who I am and why I'm there. I understood her family's struggle. Acknowledge my presence and let the world know that their dead daughter was in love with a Muslim kid. ignore my presence and disrespect their daughter. It saddened me beyond measure, for them, for me, and for the world we live in.

I was 25 years old. I wasn't equipped to handle it.

My Week in Hyderabad

There are two Hyderabads. One where the average Hyderabadi is barely surviving, struggling to meet ends. I'll call this the Old Hyderabad. The other is the affluent Hyderabad, living a better life than even those in the United States. To me, this is the New Hyderabad. I was lucky enough to experience both in one week.

The Old is very much trapped under a glass ceiling with no opportunity or hope. Education and medical services aren’t free in India, so their very survival is a game of chance. Numerous times a day I see toddlers and young kids on bikes and rickshaws hanging on for dear life, held tightly under the mother’s arm while the father zips through reckless traffic. They're oblivious to the dangers with a smile on their face. To them, it's just another adventure. I grew up like this and at the time it was what the world was. Never gave it a second thought. Compare this to the New where kids have their own Audis and Benzs, with a chauffeur to take them anywhere their little heart desires.

The Old are scrambling to find money for school fees while the New are hosting birthday parties that cost around 40-lakhs. One lakh converts to approximately $1,500 at the current rate.

The New are authoritative, confident and with a rule-the-world attitude. The Old are timid, lack self-confidence and have lost their dignity a long time ago. They're glad to receive handouts and charity of any kind.

Some key pictures:

Meet some of my classmates from elementary school. Left to right - me, Sharanya, Kamal, Fatima, Zulfi and Anupama.

Classmates from HPS (R)

Left to right - me, Suman Saref, Anurag Bhatia (owner of Business World magazine, media king of India but not my classmate) and Davinder.

Left to right - me, Feroz Khan (Member of Legislature, Hyderabad, not a classmate), Suman and Davinder.