If I had to sum up everything I've ever wanted to tell you into one sentence, it would be - You're the best friend you'll ever have, and the worst enemy.
As you progress through life, you'll learn things. Some the hard way while others will come naturally to you. You will thrive in areas where you see others struggle, and struggle in areas where you see others are doing just fine. It's just part of life and it's what makes us, us.
There is so much I want to tell you. I will try and organize it better than how it exists in my brain today, a never ending, intertwined, closed loop chain of thoughts.
God
- God exists, but not where people are looking for Him. Humans have driven Him out of mosques, temples and churches a long time ago with their egos and ignorance. If you're looking for rituals to follow, you'll find plenty. What to wear, how to wear it, when to pray, whom to like, whom to hate, and countless other mundane things. Ignore them the best you can. God is in you. He is the voice that tells you right from wrong. He is the one you justify every bad decision you make. Listen to that voice. Always. We were never a religious household and I couldn't be happier about that. I couldn't be prouder of what both of you have turned out to be as individuals. I've tried my best to encourage you both to be free thinkers and stay liberated from the chains of unnecessary social bindings. I came from a fairly conservative background, so it hasn't been easy for me. It's refreshing to see what both of you have turned out to be. I couldn't be prouder.
Must and Should
- There are very few "must" and "should" in life. Don't let anyone fool you into something you must do or should do without taking the time to assess it for yourself. Do it if your heart agrees. Doesn't matter what the consequences will be, never do something you don't agree with for someone else. Never take advice from someone who doesn't have to bear the consequences.
Words
- Words matter. Be very deliberate with your choice of words when you talk to people, and more importantly when you talk about people. Always remember that the friend who is talking bad about someone to you, is also the one doing the same about you with someone else. Learn a new word everyday if you can. Your choice of words is the best reflection of your intellect.
Doing Good
- Do good, but never expect anything back.
Love
- Love is everything. Love is where you will find God. Love someone from your heart, stay true to them no matter what. Overlook small things and look at the big picture when love becomes hard. Because it will. Remember there are two forms of love - one where someone loves you for who you are and the other for who you are to them. If you find the first kind, hold on to it for life. It's precious. When someone loves you for who you can be for them, try not to get too attached. You deserve better. You will learn to recognize the difference as you grow older. More importantly, your heart will tell you the difference.
Truth
- Your truth is convenient, so is everyone else's. Give people the consideration they deserve when your truths don't match. There will be people who will abuse that privilege. Move on. Never look back.
Money
- Money isn't everything, but it is very important. Forget the fairly tale world where money and evil go together. It's an unnecessary exaggeration of the fact that anything is excess is bad. Money is no different. Learn the difference. I focused on your education for one single reason - all your life I want you to make your own money. Never depend on your life partners income. You will always be free if you do that.
Do Right
- Do what is right, not what is easy. I wish you never have to make that choice in your life, but if you do, always choose what's right. Easy will always turn out to be difficult in the long run.
Relationships
- Givers and takers. All your relationships will into one of these two. You are also someone's giver and a taker. When you are the taker, remember that your only payback is loyalty. Stand by those who have helped you and never ever backstab someone who has helped you in even the smallest way. Never use people.
Did I mention this is an open letter? it's open in the sense that it's not sealed yet. As I go through life, I will learn too. I will continue to pass it on to you as my way of giving back to both of you for the pride and joy you have given me.
Love,
Your Dad
P.S.: You both are still my chaggus and gubbus. That's never going to change.